Consult elder care attorney about financial protection Caregivers Corner

Consult elder care attorney about financial protection

Dear Mary, My stepfather has been diagnosed with mild dementia. He has always had anger issues, but they seem to be much worse now. He is verbally abusive to my 72-year-old mother and, since his diagnosis, he disappears for days at a time. He and my mother have credit cards with both of their names listed and I am worried that he will "max" out their credit and she will be responsible to pay the bills. Where do we turn?

Dear Reader, Your mother needs to let her husband's doctor know about the behaviors he is exhibiting. It is possible that your father-in-law is experiencing depression upon his recent diagnosis and the physician may change or add medication to his regime. He may also want to reassess him to determine if he is still capable of making financial and other major decisions.

She should also consult an elder care attorney to take steps to protect her finances in the event that he does overextend their credit line and to protect any assets that are in both of their names. An elder care attorney can also advise your mother regarding being named the financial and/or medical power of attorney. The Department of Aging and Disabilities Services for Seniors, Adults with Disabilities and Caregivers has a listing of local attorneys who specialize in elder issues.

Please make sure that your mother is taking care of herself; encourage her to call 911 if she, at any time, feels threatened by her husband's behavior. Help her devise a plan of who she would call if she needs to leave the house quickly.

Also encourage your mom to join a caregiver support group. (You can attend with her if that would make her feel more comfortable to start.) Support group members validate each other's experiences and feelings. They are also a great place to ask for advice, learn about useful resources and just a good place to vent. No one will judge her or her feelings and she may learn that she is not alone in her experience.

Anne Arundel County's Family Caregiver Support Program offers two caregiver support groups each month. You can find the schedule online at www.aacounty.org/aging or contact me to have one mailed to you.

Dear Mary, I am now Medicare eligible and when I went for my yearly physical, my doctor told me that Medicare would now pay for a memory screening. What's the point? If I am going to get Alzheimer's disease, the screening isn't going to stop it from happening.

Dear Reader, A memory screening is a non-invasive test, consisting of a series of questions and tasks designed to assess thinking, language and other cognitive functions. When performed by a qualified health care professional, the test most often relieves an individual's concern about their memory.

The screening also serves as a benchmark to monitor possible future cognitive and memory functions. The screening itself does not provide a diagnosis but can, if necessary, put a person on the right track for further testing and treatment.

Most screenings last 10 minutes or less and, as you stated, Medicare will now pay for them.

Dear Readers, As we come to the end of National Family Caregivers Month, I would like to say a special thanks to all of you who are caring for a family member, friend or neighbor.

The work you do is invaluable and the many roles you play enable your loved one to have a much higher quality of life than you ever thought possible.

In Gail Sheehy's 2010 book "Passages in Caregiving: Turning Chaos Into Confidence," she wondered who would respond to the following help wanted advertisement. I hope it not only puts a smile on your face, but encourages you to applaud yourself for the job you do!

Help wanted

Untrained family member or friend to act as advocate, researcher, care manager and emotional support for a parent or spouse, sibling or friend, who has been diagnosed with a serious illness or chronic disability.

Duties: Make medical decisions, negotiate with insurance companies or Medicare, pay bills, legal work, personal care and entertainment in hospital and rehab.

Aftercare at home: Substitute for skilled nurse if injections, IV, oxygen, wound care or tube feedings are required.

Long-term care: Medication management, showering, toileting, lifting, transporting, etc.

Hours: On demand.

Salary and benefits: Zero.

Questions and comments can be sent to Mary Chaput at the Department of Aging and Disabilities, 2666 Riva Road, Suite 400, Annapolis, MD 21401, or emailed to [email protected].

Caregivers Corner

Mary Chaput