Season of sorrow: Tech senior carries on through heartache in wake of tragedies

Nov. 18--On the Tuesday evening before his final Texas Tech home game, Talor Nunez patiently answered questions from a circle of reporters. Then the Red Raiders' defensive lineman changed out of his practice gear, got dressed and drove back to Tahoka, where he'd already spent a couple of hours earlier in the day.

Reilly Gwin played with Nunez in high school at Midland Lee and once roomed with him at Texas Tech, and early Tuesday morning, Reilly's father, Terry Gwin, died in a two-vehicle accident south of Tahoka.

This fall, Talor Nunez has learned more than he ever wanted about tragedy and how to share the grief.

"He's my best friend, and I just lost my dad," Nunez said. "I feel like I can relate to him and help him through this process, because he's also the older sibling as well. It's almost like the same deal, so I've got to be there for him."

So on Wednesday night, Talor and Kaylee Nunez made another trip to Tahoka, the ones so recently comforted trying to offer comfort. How much can one man take? On Sept. 19, Nunez lost his dad to pancreatic cancer, and on Oct. 24, he and Kaylee lost their first child to a miscarriage. And now a best friend's father, also gone.

"It's been rough," Kaylee Nunez said. "Really, honestly, just clinging to our faith has gotten us through it all."

Leaning on faith

Talor Nunez can mark time this season by matching up the hardest moments of his life with Tech football games. He missed the Arizona State game to be there for his father, Domingo Nunez's, last few days in a Lubbock hospital. The next week, as his Tech teammates played Houston, Talor attended his dad's funeral in Midland. In week eight, he stayed home from Oklahoma to be with his wife after they lost their unborn baby.

In game 11, he'll be playing on Saturday while his thoughts are with the Gwins, having a funeral of their own.

How much can one man handle?

As darkness gathered Tuesday, Nunez recounted his nightmarish past few months in a steady voice, sniffling with emotion.

"I always think about II Corinthians 12:9," Nunez said, "when Jesus says that his power is made perfect in our weakness. 'Therefore, I boast more gladly in my weakness so that Christ's power may reside in me.'

"Every day, I lift up all my worries and all my weaknesses to God, all my hurt up to him. And then every day I come to this (football) facility and I go to class knowing that he has me and that good things will come out of this."

It's not just the tragedies. In a family of four sons, important decisions and actions also fell on Talor's shoulders: Calling his brother's commanding officer at the Air Force Academy so that he could come home. Deciding whether to let his dad undergo a surgery he might not survive. And, once Domingo Nunez passed away, deciding what to do with his insurance business.

So when 16 Red Raiders players are recognized Saturday on senior day before Texas Tech plays TCU, no one would blame Nunez if he's hit by a wave of emotion. But he's made up his mind to finish the season.

"I'm just glad to be out on the field with all the guys," he said. "I'm glad to be here and finish after all the crazy emotions of this semester, but I also recognize that I'm leaving a legacy for my dad by finishing. He always told me that I have to adapt, I have to improvise and I have to overcome, and I've always thought about that."

He flipped his wrist. "That's why I have it on my bracelet."

Emotional rollercoaster

For Nunez, these worst of times followed the best of times. In April, he was named recipient of Texas Tech's McAuley Distinguished Engineering Student Award, which requires a 3.5 grade-point average. He and Kaylee got married in May. Kaylee was two years ahead of Talor at Midland Lee, but she was smitten by their first embrace. "He gives a great hug," she said.

Talor graduated from Tech in August with a mechanical engineering degree. His father was a 1992 Tech graduate in electrical engineering.

Talor didn't know it at the time, but Domingo was already not feeling well on his son's graduation day. His cancer diagnosis came in late August while the Red Raiders were in preseason practice. Not long after, a ray of joy pierced the somber time.

Those last weeks the elder Nunez spent at Covenant Medical Center, a baby's onesie hung in his room. Stitched into the garment was "Only the Best Parents Get Promoted to Grandparents."

"Thankfully, we were able to tell his dad we were pregnant while his dad was still alive," Kaylee said, "and that was kind of the light for everyone."

"This was going to be his first grandchild," Talor said, "so he was real excited. And I knew that he was fighting through those surgeries for that grandchild."

With both gone, Kaylee says she and her husband find some peace in believing the family patriarch and his first grandchild are together, Domingo being, Kaylee says, "the best babysitter in the world."

Staying strong

In the swirl of emotions, Nunez now thinks of his dad every day. About how they'd sit and watch football games together and about how his dad used to love watching Arnold Schwarzenegger movies. He also thinks of those times when they'd just do hard work, digging a ditch or mowing the lawn.

One of the challenges in recent weeks was deciding what to do with the elder Nunez's insurance business that he'd had since the early 2000s.

"I actually didn't know if I was going to be able to come back to football," Talor said, "because the company was telling me that someone within the family would have to take over the business and would have to go get their insurance license and all that. My mom was not really in the state of mind to go take the test, and so I was pretty much the next person up.

"And so I was preparing myself to go learn how to do insurance and sell insurance. My mom finally decided, 'No, we're just going to sell the business. You need to finish school. Finish your grad school and finish your season.' So that next day, I drove here, got ready for practice and played that Saturday."

As he will this Saturday. No. 95 will run out to his usual spot on the kickoff-return team, maybe rotate in for snaps with the defensive line.

Something will be missing, though.

"The hard part for Talor, where he struggles, is after the games," Kaylee said, "where he can't call his dad. It's almost like he misses the criticism from his dad after the game, telling him, 'You should have done this, son,' and things like that."

What remains, however, are fond memories and an accumulated wisdom. After his first surgery, Domingo told Talor he knew the one person he didn't have to worry about, the one who'd be OK, was Talor.

"I feel like everything my dad and my mom have taught me and my faith," Talor said, "have set me up for this time in my life, to push through the storm and cling on my faith in every way."

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