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(MALE ANNOUNCER) AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE FOR AMERICANS AGE 50 TO 85. (SISTER #1) OH, MY GOSH, YOU'RE STILL USING MOM'S OLD COFFEE POT. -IT'S MY INHERITANCE. -WELL, IT IS A FAMILY HEIRLOOM. (SISTER #2) YOU KNOW WHAT, THE KIDS CAN JUST SELL IT TO PAY FOR MY FUNERAL. IT'S A GOOD THING YOU HAVE LIFE INSURANCE. (SISTER #2) LIFE INSURANCE? WITH OUR FAMILY HISTORY? (SISTER #1) DON'T YOU KNOW ABOUT COLONIAL PENN? IT'S GUARANTEED ACCEPTANCE, WHOLE LIFE INSURANCE WITH NO MEDICAL QUESTIONS ASKED. -I'M ON A FIXED INCOME. -WHO ISN'T? -YOU HAVE IT? -WE ALL DO! JOHN, MARIA, EVEN PAUL WITH ALL OF HIS MEDICAL PROBLEMS. HUH. COLONIAL PENN? THAT'S RIGHT, COLONIAL PENN LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY. AS YOU GET OLDER, YOUR HEALTH MAY CHANGE. COLONIAL PENN UNDERSTANDS THAT, AND WE DON'T THINK IT SHOULD KEEP YOU FROM GETTING LIFE INSURANCE TO HELP PROTECT YOUR FAMILY. THAT'S WHY WE GUARANTEE ACCEPTANCE TO EVERYONE AGE 50 TO 85. NO HEALTH QUESTIONS, NO MEDICAL EXAM. APPLYING IS EASY, AND YOU HAVE YOUR CHOICE OF OPTIONS STARTING AT $9.95 A MONTH, A FEW DOLLARS A WEEK, 35 CENTS A DAY. AND YOUR PRICE WILL NEVER GO UP, A LIFETIME RATE LOCK GUARANTEES IT. THIS PROTECTION CAN LAST A LIFETIME, TOO. SOME INSURANCE POLICIES END ONCE YOU REACH A CERTAIN AGE. NOT THIS ONE. PAY YOUR BILL AND IT'S YOURS TO KEEP FOR AS LONG AS YOU'D LIKE. HOW DID YOU APPLY? CALLED FOR INFORMATION, GOT AN APPLICATION, FILLED IT OUT, SENT IT BACK, IT TOOK A FEW MINUTES. AND LOOK AT THIS, THEY SENT ME THIS FREE BENEFICIARY PLANNER JUST FOR CALLING. I FILLED IN ALL MY IMPORTANT INFORMATION AND FINAL WISHES. NOW MY KIDS WILL HAVE EVERYTHING THEY NEED IN ONE PLACE. READY TO LEARN MORE? CALL FOR FREE INFORMATION AND YOUR FREE GIFT. THERE'S NO OBLIGATION. EVERY POLICY WE ISSUE COMES WITH A 30-DAY MONEY BACK GUARANTEE. YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE. WHY WAIT? CALL NOW. WHAT IS HOLLAND? CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY COLUMBIA TRISTAR DOMESTIC TELEVISION WHAT DO YOU MEAN, WHAT IS IT? IT'S A COUNTRY RIGHT NEXT TO BELGIUM. NO. THAT'S THE NETHERLANDS. HOLLAND IS THE NETHERLANDS. THEN WHO ARE THE DUTCH? YOU KNOW, I CANNOT STAND THIS THING ANYMORE. I KNOW. I HATE IT, TOO. I FEEL LIKE AN OUT-OF-WORK PORN STAR. I TOLD YOU WE SHOULD HAVE TAKEN SOME KIND OF VACATION. WELL, WHY DIDN'T WE? BECAUSE YOU SAID THIS WOULD BE BETTER. REMEMBER? "A VACATION FROM OURSELVES." THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID. WHAT IF WE GREW MUTTONCHOPS? NO. BUZZ CUTS? PARACHUTE PANTS?! STOP IT, GEORGE, STOP IT! I'M SORRY. YOU'VE GOTTA GET A JOB. DAMN IT. See? HomeQuote Explorer lets you easily compare home insurance options so you can get what you need without overpaying. Yeah, we've spent a lot on this kitchen. Oh, yeah, really high-end stuff. -Sorry, that's our ghost. -Yeah, okay. He's more annoying than anything. Too bad there's mold behind the backsplash. [ Sniffs ] Yep, that's mold. Well, then, let's see if we can save you some money with Progressive. Guess how much I originally paid for this fireplace? 23 bucks. Materials and labor. Just ignore him. You got bamboozled! Millions of people have lost weight with personalized Plans from Noom. Like Stephanie who lost 38 pounds. The fact that it truly is just a few minutes a day is life changing. You're building this foundation to set you up for life. All you have to do is listen. Get started today and lose 15 pounds in 15 weeks.