In The 239: Sex big part of comedian Mitch Fatel’s life, standup

April 02--Sex offers a topic comedian Mitch Fatel embraces.

"I've always been fascinated by sex," Fatel said in a phone interview this week from Hoboken, N.J. "I always wanted to talk about sex in a way nobody else did. My goal was to be vulgar in a nonvulgar way."

Fatel (pronounced Fay-TELL) performs Friday, Saturday and Sunday at Capt. Brien's Seafood and Raw Bar, home of the Off the Hook Comedy Club, 599 S. Collier Blvd., Marco Island.

The Rockland County, N.Y., native began standup as a teen when his father took him to comedy clubs in New York City. Fatel said he often performed for a few minutes, wearing his Incredible Hulk feet pajamas on stage.

"I would be horribly bad and told jokes about school that no one got," he said.

The audience laughed and Fatel said he only learned years later -- while watching video of his performances -- that it was doing so to not hurt the then-15-year-old's feelings.

Someone thought his young comedy would work well for a convention of insurance salesmen, so he was asked to perform for them.

"I started getting heckled by all these old, drunk insurance dudes," Fatel recalled.

He said he retaliated by saying they didn't understand good humor and someday he would be famous. The experience, however, scarred him from doing standup until he was 18, he said.

Fatel eventually found his way as an intern onto the staff of Howard Stern's radio show. Stern was one of his two comedic idols, he said.

"He literally rocked my world," Fatel said. "He was the guy in school I was -- the outcast. He taught me to be true to myself, who I am."

The time with the shock jock was good and bad, Fatel said. He said he told Stern how he thought the world of him.

"He said, 'Good, get me some coffee now,' " Fatel remembered.

The good side, Fatel explained, was seeing Stern work hard every day, and his commitment to continuing to make his radio show a success.

"There was a moment working for Howard where he became too real to me and I didn't like him for a long time," Fatel said.

Years later, when Fatel returned to Stern's show as a guest, Stern told him how funny he was.

"I finally earned it," Fatel said. "I tried to take a shortcut in life for him liking me, and I don't think shortcuts in life work."

That's why Fatel said he never wants to meet his other idol, Steve Martin.

"He made me want to become a comedian," he said. "I couldn't believe, as a little kid, a man could act so silly and be paid for it. All that things I would get yelled at in school by teachers was what he did as a standup comedian."

It took him a while, Fatel said, but he now appreciates the art of standup.

"I just wanted the girls to like me," he said of how he began. "I like the writing. The art of standup is an ever-changing evolution."

Fatel pointed to how his wife, Jessica, has helped with his standup. Jessica is bisexual and has a girlfriend, so Fatel said he inserts that dimension into his act.

"I like bringing that out to the audience, showing an alternative view of marriage," he said.

Fatel said he doesn't shy from talking about his fascination with sex, and learned a valuable lessons years ago. He said he was on stage and noticed grandparents in the front row, so he decided to tailor his jokes and not discuss sex.

After the show, that same elderly couple approached him.

"They started going through all my jokes -- they were so upset I didn't do those jokes," Fatel said.

"That's just as bad as racism, to assume someone is older and wouldn't laugh at sex. That's terrible, I made for them what they shouldn't or should laugh at."

Fatel said performing standup takes time to perfect, but he still enjoys the challenge of bringing new material into his bits.

"Half the battle, anything you're successful at, is just doing it," he said.

"One of the things I learned is failure is one of the most incredible teachers in the world."

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