Guest Column: I lost my mom to cancer. Better advocacy is needed.

All through the fall, I heard stories of hope and healing from breast cancer patients who, through new treatments and innovations, are living longer and breaking free from the disease. And while I'm happy for these patients and their families, it also hurts because my family was not so lucky. We were robbed of hope and healing by my mother's health insurance company. Because of denials and delays, my mother died of metastatic breast cancer at only 55 years old.

Mom, or 'Jammie' as my son called her, was one of a kind. She loved life. She was the life of the party, and as a labor and delivery nurse, she loved bringing a new life into the world.

When she was first diagnosed with breast cancer in 2011, she fought hard, forging her own path and making decisions about her treatment and care. But when the cancer metastasized in 2018, mom worked with a dedicated team of oncologists who were determined to get her the care she needed.

But as we soon learned, hard work and dedication are still no match for overcoming the maze of burdens and hurdles that insurance companies and their pharmacy benefit managers put in the way of patients — even the very sickest of cancer patients.

It all happened very quickly. In mid-April of that year, Mom's new oncologist prescribed a treatment that she felt would give her the best chance of staving off disease progression. Over the next month, the insurance company refused to pay for the treatment and denied and delayed the appeals process.

They tried every trick in the book, including repeatedly asking the doctor's office to send in paper copies of forms that had already been completed online. It would be laughable if it wasn't so painful to watch.

Mom had no treatment during this time and ended up in the hospital for two weeks. Ironically, the same day she was admitted to the hospital, the treatment approval finally came through. But it was too late.

Those six weeks of insurance denials robbed my mother of precious time and of the hope that comes with having options — time that may have cost her life. Because of the delays, she didn't have the chance to try the medication that may have extended her time with us.

She was released from the hospital to hospice, because she told me she wanted to die at home. She passed away a short time later. A life cut short at just 55 years old.

My brother and I will never know if that treatment would have made a difference. It is so incredibly awful to watch someone you love to suffer, and there's nothing you can do about it. Our family has been forever changed. My nieces and daughter will never know Jammie. My son who does remember her asks for her often.

No family should have to endure what ours did. My mom deserved the chance to fight, but insurance denials stole that from her. Families across the country face the same roadblocks — delays, denials and decisions made by insurance middlemen instead of doctors.

And it's not just breast cancer patients. People battling chronic blood, stomach and other serious cancers are facing the same uphill fight — not just against their diagnosis, but against an insurance system that too often stands in the way of clinical care.

These insurance practices have sunk to a dangerous new low, and something needs to be done to stop this from continuing to happen. My brother and I have spoken out. We've been to Washington to talk with Sen. Bill Cassidy.

We're supportive of any legislation that puts the power of treatment and prescribing back in the hands of the doctors where it should be. Congress can start by advancing PBM reform to bring transparency and accountability to insurers and middlemen, and by passing commonsense reforms like the Safe Step Act to ensure patients get timely access to the treatments their doctors prescribe.

We're fighting for patients like our mom, who deserved better from the system than what she got. Cancer already takes so much. No one should have to fight their insurer, too.