Albuquerque Journal, N.M., Upfront column

Aug. 13--Sometime after the handcuffs went on that January night, Marsella Duarte must have thought: God, not again.

It wasn't the first time her connection to a high-profile but flawed older man had sucked her too far and too notoriously into a dysfunctional world. In March 2008, she had been the much younger paramour of disgraced former state District Judge W. John Brennan -- she was 25, he was 61 -- for about seven months when her screams for help from the second floor of Brennan's Las Lomas NE home brought Albuquerque police and front-page news over accusations that he had become rough with her after she refused to have sex with him and a prostitute.

The felony domestic violence charges against Brennan, who had resigned as chief judge from the 2nd Judicial District in 2004 after his arrest for DWI and cocaine possession, were later reduced to false imprisonment and misdemeanor battery and then dismissed altogether, largely she says now on her decision to protect him, not help in his prosecution.

Her compassion, much to her surprise, raised questions of her mental stability.

"I was the victim," she said. "But I was made to look like the crazy bad guy."

This January, there she was again in the public eye with a well-known man in trouble.

"I'm a loyal person," she said. "Sometimes that's not a good thing."

Marc Saavedra, a longtime friend of Duarte's, made headlines after his July 23 arrest on a drunken driving charge. It was his third DWI arrest -- and it ruined his last chance to keep his job as a high-paid and well-respected lobbyist for the University of New Mexico. He resigned effective Aug. 8.

Saavedra's DWI arrest dredged up a Jan. 8 brush with the law that had, until then, escaped the media's attention. That incident involved accusations that Saavedra and a young woman, described in a criminal complaint as "very intoxicated," had stiffed a taxi driver out of a $28 fare.

The woman with Saavedra that night was Duarte.

Both Duarte and Saavedra, 42, were charged with falsely obtaining services or accommodations, a misdemeanor -- and, Duarte said, a complete misunderstanding.

Duarte was also charged with resisting arrest, though she said all she was resisting was a humiliating pat-down and being hurt when tossed into a jail transport van.

Charges against her and Saavedra were dismissed in June because the arresting officer failed to show up in court.

The Journal's story on the taxi incident did not include what, according to the criminal complaint, the taxi driver said he heard Duarte say to Saavedra that night: "How are you going to pay me?"

Still, Duarte said people knew about that comment. Many assumed the worst.

"They thought it was about payment for sex, which is laughable," she said. "What I said was, 'You better pay me back' for the cab fare."

So, enough. After years of staying silent, lying low and licking her wounds in private, Duarte said she is ready to set the record straight. She is honest about the poorer choices she's made, strong-willed, still loyal to her friends and, yes, a little amazed that her life needs any explanation.

"John was wrong. Marc was wrong. I was wrong," she said. "We all make mistakes in life. Mine are just more animated."

She is 32 now but considers herself an old soul who grew up fast in a family involved in politics, government and law. Her mother is Romaine Serna, a former top official with the state Children, Youth and Families Department. Her father is Leroy Duarte, a criminal defense attorney. Her uncle is former insurance superintendent Eric Serna.

"As a child, I handed out campaign buttons for Bruce King," she said. "Politics is in my blood."

She has always been drawn to an older, more established circle of friends -- her "people," as she likes to call them.

"So many have been amazing mentors, amazing people, men and women, Democrat and Republican, who have taught me so much," she said. "They are still my friends."

But she has also been drawn to powerful, imperfect folks.

"I'm a nurturer," she said. "If I find someone to fix who's broken, then I'm not broken."

That was true for Brennan. Duarte said she willingly signed an affidavit saying that he had not harmed her that night. But she said she was blindsided by news accounts of a psychological evaluation, conducted at the request of Brennan's attorney, that portrayed her as having "a number of severe psychiatric disorders."

That evaluation, conducted by Samuel Roll, a professor emeritus of the University of New Mexico psychology department, was based not on a personal evaluation but on statements she made to Albuquerque police.

"He never spoke to me," she said.

Duarte said the fallout was so painful that she went into hiding in Las Cruces.

Still, she remains protective of Brennan, and she said she would still likely sacrifice her reputation to save him.

"I'm not going to send someone to prison," she said. "If that means I have to be called a nut job in the newspaper, then I'm going to take that jab."

As for Saavedra, Duarte said that January night both had been among a group of lawyers and politicos having a few -- perhaps a few too many -- drinks at Sister Bar in Downtown Albuquerque. Duarte said she and Saavedra decided to share a cab rather than drive home -- he was going to his apartment near 14th and Central NW, she was going to stay with a friend near 14th and Lomas NW.

"It was my decision to baby-sit him, to fix him," she said.

The original cab fare to Saavedra's apartment was $9, she said. But Saavedra had no money and she had $5. Duarte said she asked the driver to take them to an ATM near Rio Grande and Mountain NW so she could withdraw money to pay the fare.

She was at the ATM when Saavedra ran, she said.

"So he's running across Rio Grande in traffic, and I ran after him because I was afraid he would get run over," she said. "I wasn't trying to ditch the taxi driver."

She said she doesn't know what happened to Saavedra that night. She said the taxi driver spoke with a heavy accent and she assumed English was not his first language, which is why he misunderstood her "pay me" comment.

She and Saavedra remain friends, she said.

These days, Duarte lives a quiet but busy life with her mother and her dogs on Albuquerque'sWest Side. She works in her father's law office and contracts with other lawyers for office work. She plans on going to law school out of state.

She does not consider herself a party girl. The only party she cares about is the Democratic one. She serves on the board of the Young Democrats of New Mexico, and last September she and her mother were honored by the Democratic Party of New Mexico as the best mother-daughter team.

She has learned that sometimes when you fly too close to the flame of power and politics you get burned, and she has. But oh, what a brilliant light it gives. And maybe that is too hard to give up completely.

UpFront is a daily front-page news and opinion column. Comment directly to Joline at 823-3603, jkrueger@abqjournal. com or follow her on Twitter @jolinegkg. Go to www.abqjournal.com/letters/new to submit a letter to the editor.

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