Tom Farrell

Sept. 26--His whole life, Tom Farrell looked out for other people.

From a childhood escapade when he took his little brother and ran away from troubles at home, to this summer when, despite his age and worsening health, he helped organize a fundraiser for United Cerebral Palsy.

Farrell died Wednesday at his Spring Lake Village home after a lengthy bout with prostate cancer. He was 88. Services are pending.

Farrell's family moved from Butte, Mont., to Santa Rosa in 1936, when he was 10. He spent his life here, immersing himself in a wide range of causes to benefit others locally and regionally, particularly for the disabled.

"He knew everyone in town," said his friend, Marty McReynolds, who met Farrell in a writing class several years ago. "He was very friendly and so helpful to me in many ways. I owe him a debt of gratitude just for being my friend."

Farrell left a lasting impression on people with his generosity. His recommendation could do wonders.

As a young nursing student, Barbara DiIorio applied for a part-time job with Farrell's wife, Evelyn.

"The first words out of her mouth were, 'You need Tom Farrell. He will open doors for you, because he knows everybody. You need the Farrells in your life,'" DiIorio recalled. "And they've been in my life ever since. A lifelong friendship grew."

She said it was difficult for Farrell recently when he wasn't able to be so active.

"He was so caring, so deeply committed," she said. "His work with people with disabilities was lifelong, from a very young age. His commitment was unflagging, to his death."

In 1981, Farrell was one of five people honored in the Bay Area for their community contributions, including his eight years on the board of the Sonoma Developmental Center. He also worked to raise money for the hospital for major projects, but also little things like holiday parties or small gifts for the patients.

Farrell and his wife had four children, including a daughter who is profoundly disabled and has lived at the Glen Ellen center since she was a child. Evelyn Farrell died in 2013.

Having a severely disabled child motivated Farrell to become a leader in policies affecting organizations that support those with mental and physical disabilities.

When then-California Gov. Ronald Reagan slashed the mental health budget and services for the disabled, Farrell resigned from the board to protest the cuts, making the front page of the San Francisco Chronicle and Bay Area TV news.

When Reagan later became president, he appointed Farrell to a national committee on mental retardation, on which he served for six years, said his son, Brien Farrell.

A few years ago, Tom Farrell was asked about the most important lesson he'd learned in life. He wrote a paper on what he called "The Commonality of the Human Experience."

In it, he reflected on his projects with friends in the Baptist Church, his honorary membership in the Japanese-American Citizens League and his activities with the Italian Cultural Foundation, among others. He wrote about his four children, three of whom are college graduates, and one severely disabled.

"The most important lesson I have learned is that there is a commonality of the human experience... Before we are born we do not receive a written guarantee from some higher power stating that we will never be disabled from an illness or accident, never get old and never die," he wrote. "None of these choices are available to any human being. Therefore, we each share in this 'commonality of the human experience' and as fellow participants in the 'lottery of life.'"

"These were important themes for him in building support for better services for the disabled," said his son.

For nearly 30 years, Farrell was a regional manager for Lincoln National Insurance Company in Santa Rosa. He became an independent broker for about five years, then served for five years as a family advocate/adviser to the state for people with disabilities, Brien Farrell said.

He built long-lasting friendships with Art Ibleto, the Rev. James Coffee and Santa Rosa High School classmates from the 1940s including Tony Negri, Everett Shapiro, Ralph DeMarco, Bill Geary, Dusty Destruel, Bud Anderson and others, some of whom still meet at Willie Bird's each month.

Farrell was a member of Rotary for more than 50 years, including the past 30 with the Sebastopol club, rounding up support for projects including a summer camp for abused children and creating a program to provide jobs for disabled adults, many of whom had never been employed before.

"My dad had a fine Irish tenor voice, and he recorded a version of 'I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas' in 1946," Brien Farrell said. "He could whistle along with anything, from opera to rock and roll. He had almost perfect pitch."

He also played accordion at several Italian festivals, where he was identified on the programs as the honorary Italian Tom "Farrelli."

In addition to his son Brien, a teacher who was Santa Rosa's city attorney for several years, Farrell is survived by three other children: Jerry Farrell of Minnesota; Leslie Lightfoot of Lancaster, Pa.; and Susan Farrell of Glen Ellen; seven grandchildren; and a brother, Ed Farrell of Austin, Texas.

A date for services will be announced soon.

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