Star Tribune (Minneapolis) C.J. column
By C.J., Star Tribune (Minneapolis) | |
McClatchy-Tribune Information Services |
I know this.
But I slipped up when
While that was an embarrassing instant, my stellar moment came when I asked a question so funny that Golic kind of giggled while repeating it. Listen for the question that mentions the word "cow" and hear Golic's delightful response in my startribune.com/video.
Q: A guest living or dead you would love to have on the show?
Greeny: First of all, I think I'd rather have one living.
Golic: I would as well. Because we have to carry the dead.
Greeny: Generally speaking, I think dead would be tough. We've had some bad interviews, but I think very few would be as difficult as that.
Golic: We wouldn't even get any kind of acknowledgment, that we were really doing an interview. That would hurt our feelings as well -- couldn't even get any kind of a look.
Greeny: The ultimate sports interviews are somewhat obvious, I would guess.
Golic: I would not want to talk to him, though. I would love to interview Thor, quite honestly, is where I would go. With the different realm that he's in and to get here to Earth and how heavy is the hammer that he carries.
Q: And why is he the only one who can lift it?
Golic: Exactly right. And it always comes back to him like a boomerang. I mean, the questions are endless that you could talk about with Thor.
Greeny: You talk to Thor and I'll talk to
Golic: And if we can't get those two guys, then we'll talk to a dead person.
Q: You can get anybody you want who's alive, right? [I got away with that one!]
Golic: Pretty much.
Q: What color are Greeny's eyes?
Greeny: I'm looking away.
Golic: I have never looked deep into his eyes at any point. I think they're orange.
Greeny: Come on, be serious. You have no idea what color my eyes are? They're green.
Golic: Brown They're green. See, I knew that.
Greeny: Brown [is the color of Golic's eyes]. In what can be described as a startling revelation, I noticed something and he didn't. He has been sitting 2 feet away from me four hours a day every day for 141/2 years and he doesn't know what color my eyes are.
Golic: The thing is, I know the color of my dogs' eyes. I love my dogs, way more than Greeny.
Q: Do you guys have insurance policies on each other -- since your success is so connected to your great chemistry?
Golic: I would make more if he were not on the show. He owes everything to me. Quite honestly, I think he has a hit out on me.
Greeny: I think I am his insurance policy. The answer is no, but Lloyd's of
Golic: I'll bet I could get a good 10 bucks for you.
Greeny: What are we insuring, the golden voice? Not
Golic: Yes, it is.
Q: What did you guys learn from hosting the in-stadium announcement of the All-Star Game Home Run Derby last year?
Golic: The seating.
Greeny: Last year, they put us in a location that would have been a perfect location, right behind third base, except that when they had all the [All-Stars who] weren't participating in the derby, they were just there to watch. I couldn't see.
Golic: What, we were going to say? Tell them to move? These are the All-Stars. We're going to say, "Hey, Derek, get out of the way!" [Players] wouldn't have cared. We couldn't say anything, so we couldn't see anything.
Greeny: Literally, I was just waiting for the crack of the bat and then trying to pick up the ball in the air. I couldn't see. The number one rule of broadcasting a home run derby is location, location, location. Most of the players found it funny.
Golic: So they blocked us even more.
Q: I have a double fill-in-the-blank question.
Greeny: He will no longer be a Timberwolf by what day is it today because he will be on the roster of the
Golic: I agree. I would think it would be in a week or two. He said he wouldn't sign a long-term with the
Q: Did you both know LeBron was going back to
Golic: I thought it was between
Greeny: I didn't at all think he would go back to
Q: Will Michael Sam be on a roster?
Golic: The seventh-round pick normally when you are a draft pick, even though it was the last round, you have a good shot to be on a roster, at least, for that year. The roster, the practice squad. I think he's a good player to do that and after the year, we'll see.
Greeny: I agree and I hope that he does well. I think it would be really good, frankly, for everyone. I hope he not only plays but exceeds expectations. What everyone says is [maybe he's] a situational rusher, he's a guy who could excel. Maybe all of a sudden he's got seven, eight sacks, and he starts getting a lot more attention than expected.
Golic: Let's just hope everything's based on football.
Q: There have been gay guys in locker rooms forever?
Golic: As it turns out, I found out for one of the teams I played on there was an individual who was gay. It did not come out while we were playing. You are absolutely right. There are, I would dare say, more than a few players who are gay in professional sports. It's up to them how they want to approach that.
Greeny: This is rapidly becoming what it should be, a nonissue. I don't think this continues to be a topic for very long.
Q: I was watching "Outside the Lines" about golf addiction. As addictions go, not a bad addiction?
Greeny: One problem with a golf addiction, which I have -- my name is
Golic: To me the only thing I care about when I golf is: Is there beer available and how much?
Q: Do you guys share a political party when it comes to presidential elections?
Golic: No. The amazing thing is if we mention a political thing and we don't, it's just unreal how reactive people get. I stay out of it. One time I forgot which presidential race was going on and one of the candidates had trouble catching a football. We just mentioned it. We were inundated with e-mails of people saying, "Oh, I'll bet the other candidate can't catch." I DON'T CARE. I was just mentioning something. I just stay away from it. No reason in the world to go down that road.
Q: What's the most expensive gift you've bought for each other?
Greeny: He's never given me a gift yet.
Golic: Bought a gift?
Greeny: One year when there was an electrical outage, I slept over at the Golics' house.
Q: Which doesn't have a bidet ...
Green: It does not have a bidet.
Golic: It will never have a bidet.
Greeny: What it did have was his wife, Chris, bought me a pillow with pictures of the Wiggles on it. That was at the height of my kids being huge fans of the Wiggles, and I still have that pillow. I had it in my daughter's room and even she's too old for that now, but we still have it as a memento. That is probably the most significant gift that Golic's ever given me.
Golic: I don't get him a gift because whenever he's stayed over to the house he gives me a rider list. Seriously. On dos and don'ts if he's going to come INTO MY HOUSE. I'm sorry. There's no gift-giving going on there.
Q: Who's the better driver?
Greeny: Easily. He is. Golic is a great driver. Golic could drive
Golic: I love driving and occasionally, I go fast.
Q: Has Golic ever tried to lift Greeny off the floor or tip him like a cow?
Golic: Tip you like a cow? [Delighted laughter]
Greeny: He's lifted me off the floor, yes; he's never tipped me like a cow.
Golic: Greeny, act like a cow right now, I'm going to tip you.
Greeny: I'd like to say for the record that's one of the things that is in the rider that I send to his house. I cannot be tipped like a cow.
Q: How many games will the Vikings win this season?
Golic: Oh, my gosh.
Greeny: Five or six?
Golic: I was going to say seven. I think it's going to be an under-.500 team.
Greeny: I'm not a fan. You're putting everything on
Golic: I think it could be tough, a tough year for them.
Interviews are edited. To contact C.J. try [email protected] and to see her watch Fox 9's "Buzz."
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